Compassion Doesn't Run Out

"... Justice is not a finite commodity, nor are kindness and love." 

- Matthew Scully

The above quote, in its original context, addresses Scully's belief that it is not an excuse for people to offer no concern toward the plight of abused animals when there is already so much human suffering in the world requiring our attention. He is suggesting that we can't plug our fingers in our ears when presented with a difficult subject, with the reasoning that our capacities for caring about problems in our world are already at maximum and that we will focus on those, and not issues that seem secondary. We can care about starving people and starving animals and not feel guilty for letting seemingly "smaller problems" occupy our thoughts. Right? Sounds good to me.

I have theories on activism like this. I believe that in the same way that each of us has different talents from each other, we are also gifted with different "big problems" that nag at us and prompt us to action. For some of us, it is a widespread issue -- women's rights, hunger, pollution, or another  subject that we are passionate about no matter where it arises. 

For others of us, we are concerned with a specific place or thing, which can comprise of many of issues such as the above. We may care for the struggle of a certain endangered animal, which can be a matter of lack of habitat, environmental problems, lack of food, etc. We may be concerned for a certain place -- maybe a neighborhood -- and want to do something about the violence and poverty for that area in particular.

My theory is that we should absolutely care about all of these things. We do not have the finances to support every cause that is out there, or the time to research deeply into every single one -- time and money are finite. But allowing ourselves to feel upset over something that is wrong and offer prayer and encouragement to those who are devoting their resources to that issue? That is totally doable and I can't think of an excuse out there why we are incapable of doing that. 

There's no reason why we can't make room in our hearts for a tiny bit of awareness for every injustice that we come across as we go about our lives.

"Defend the weak and the fatherless; uphold the cause of the poor and the oppressed."

- Psalm 82:3

Transitioning into what led me to begin thinking more about this issue...

Just by my casual reading of comments on news stories, our "Christian" nation does not offer much of a heart for the plight of Detroit. We should just blow it up and start over, says the mayor of another city that experienced a tragedy that makes this comment incredibly insensitive on all counts. We should call it De-toilet instead. Because Democrats were in charge so much of the past decades, we should not give a rip about what happens now because we don't believe in their principles. Everyone in Detroit is racist against white people so we should just stay out and let them see what happens. (Seen the new mayor yet?)

The same people will book trips to Chicago and New Orleans, which also have very high violent crime rates, which is one of the many reasons they proclaim that they will never set foot in Detroit. 

I may not have known better, either, if I hadn't ever come here myself, and been able to explore Detroit with people who do understand. There are burned out shells of houses, but there are also some incredibly expensive homes inhabited by wealthy people, too. There are very fine restaurants and entertainment venues. Thousands and thousands of people live there every day, making their way how they have to and how they want to. Plenty of people can leave -- they choose not to.

I propose that if every person in this country let themselves just think that maybe it isn't a trash heap unworthy of saving -- maybe it contains national treasures that epitomize what America is all about, and diversity that makes our country colorful and rich -- and that that would make a difference. Not just slamming what they don't understand very well. Every person can afford that. It just takes a few seconds. Think that there are faces and names to the people that live here and that they do matter. 

That's all that someone has to do! And it could change the country, our politics, our churches, and so much more, just to say out loud, "I will choose to think positive about Detroit."

It's not to ignore the very real and serious problems, such as violence, blight, poverty, drugs, corruption, and the like. Thinking positively in fact propels more people to do something about these problems and be a part of building up, not tearing down.

I challenge anyone who comes across this to become a supporter of Detroit, even if just in spirit.

I have a Pinterest board devoted to finding things that might help you see a side of Detroit that you might not have before!

Anthony Bourdain just posted about his season finale of Parts Unknown, in Detroit, and might explain a little bit of what I am thinking, too. (There are a few crude words, just FYI.)

I will not pretend to be an expert or that I have done so much work rebuilding Detroit myself, but I am not afraid to go ahead and say that people need to spend a little more of their compassion on that city, no matter where they live. 

Rockin' the 313 with you,

- Lara

The 313

I am really amazed and nervous about how quickly time flies away. Our first wedding anniversary was this past Sunday already (I LOVE YOU, DARRY!!). Maybe time flies because things are going so swell -- the first year of marriage was not as hard as I had expected it to be. We got into tiny little tiffs and misunderstandings about dumb things, but the time spent biking in the woods, trying not to sound suspicious crossing the border just to get alcohol at the Windsor duty-free store, playing N64 in the basement, growing and killing plants in our yard, and all of our other adventures was way greater. 

What also really blows my mind is that right around now must be my one year anniversary of moving up to what a Floridian considers "the Great American North." (Yes, Michigan is typically categorized as the Midwest, but we seriously touch Canada. That does not make much sense to me.) Not only did I relocate to a much colder place with a higher percentage of wild bunnies running amok, but to a metro area that most people were pretty shocked to hear. "Detroit? You know that people are leaving there, right? And you're leaving Orlando for that? Good luck to ya." The decision to move up here was out of practicality more than a driving desire to defy all conventional expectation, but living near the Motor City became a lot more than that.

I had some fairly serious reservations about Detroit prior to being two miles away from it. Mind you, we do not live in the city, and anyone who says that they're "from Detroit" but do not live there are kind of being cheap to you. It's not really the same, so I can't say that I know from experience what it's like to live in the city. Darin sure can. In fact, his experiences had me a little traumatized to the point that we had to settle on somewhere else to start out. No little twenty-three year old girl enjoys her fiancé's car getting completely destroyed by semi-automatic gunfire because his neighbors had an argument with someone else, where a bullet hole went straight through the driver's side window. I agreed to be the one to move away from my family and home as long as my setting was a little less dangerous. And that's what we did, and I am happy with our home in what I guess is the "suburbs," although I've also gotten looks of surprise about Lincoln Park. I guess there are shadier parts of it? Not really sure.

We do things here and there in the city. We get saganaki in Greektown. We watch the Tigers play at Comerica. We shop for flowers and food at Eastern Market. We look at the cars at the Renaissance Center and then take the elevator to the top. We have a pretty darn good time.

We see beautiful things. 

(If you have ever watched the Superbowl, it is pretty clear that I did not make this video.)

Detroit is a city that most of America can't understand. Why would people stand behind a place that is essentially zombie land? Why don't they just let it fall to rot and let the crime lords take each other out? What good is it anymore? People who think that Detroit is a toilet and that its people are subhuman can stay home, keep shopping at their strip malls, and reading their Oprah book club books. Those people don't like culture, grit, history, flavor, diversity, resurrection. 

"Speramus Meliora; Resurget Cineribus -- We Hope For Better Things; It Shall Rise From the Ashes."

All eyes are on this place now that the emergency manager declared Chapter 9 Bankruptcy. It's a public spectacle to see the biggest American city let the court help in restructuring the massive debt, caused by the worst of government cronyism and con artists elected to office. This move sealed the deal for a lot of people's opinions, that they'll keep themselves firmly planted where they are and pick somewhere else to go on vacation (as if Detroit was ever on their mind). It may not look good, but it's a chance to make a comeback.

Darin and I are not planning on leaving anytime soon. We in fact hope to move into the actual city someday. (Fingers crossed, maybe the BK will open up some nice real estate! Haha.) Does it make any sense? Not really, if you haven't set foot into the city, and have no idea that there are hundreds of incredibly committed individuals to making the city a better place and trying to change it into something unexpected. It seems like a dumb place to settle down and one day raise a family. 

It might be nice for our kids to say where they were born, and people already know where they come from.

Florida is great and will always be my stomping grounds, but I am enjoying the four seasons, the sports, the music, the art, the food, and the life. Orlando had no shortage of fun around every corner, but Detroit is an old soul, one that whispers in a way that many people can't hear it, or refuse to hear it. We want to hear and give back.

All of my thoughts might sound silly since my experiences are really from a point of observation, still living in another chunk of Wayne County. I do not have the feelings and thoughts that someone would who was born here, and died here after a hundred years. But I have some. Detroit, you have one more voluntary visitor and promoter -- I plan on backing you up in my heart even when the world says to tear you down.

Godspeed to the future, Motor City.

Love, Lara

P.S. I realize that writing has fallen by the wayside, which is a shame. We will get caught up someday. I especially owe my awesome, BFF spouse a tribute considering that I just waxed eloquent about the most dangerous city in America, hahaha. Much love!

Fall/Winter Recap

Hi world! I have been incredibly lax about writing anything lately; there has been a lot going on in the sense of just plain busyness, but not a lot going on in the sense of "omg big news I must share and elaborate upon." It's been about a month and a half? Well, the biggest events in that time period have been having family & friends visit at long last from the southern peninsula I call my first home! (I get in trouble with Darin for calling Florida "home" because Michigan is home now, right?!?)

One of my best friends ever, Heather, came to visit at the beginning of November and we were all over the place. She accompanied me on my first visit to Eastern Market and we bought plenty of goodies, and then took a nice little trek around downtown to see the riverfront, and the big ol' Christmas tree at Campus Martius! CHRISTMAS!!!

I feel a little dorky because I go to these places plenty of times and still want to take all the pictures ever. Whatevs, I am just trying to give Detroit some of the appreciation it sorely lacks.

We ate at some of my favorite dining locations (Motor City Brewing Works has jammin' pizza and, even though I have family connections to it, I still think the food at Santorini Estiatorio is yummy yums.) I wish all my weekends were this packed full of my favorite stuff.

My parents came for the week of Thanksgiving and we also did a bunch of Detroit touring and dining and good times! And also fixed some stuff in our house... gotta love a dad who is a handyman! :) It was a good time of finally seeing my own family and also spending time with my in-law family, who were all together for a delicious and cozy Thanksgiving at my S-I-L Stephanie's lovely new house. And the Lions lost by yet another few bad calls and lame mistakes. What is life.

(Insert imaginary pictures I took while they were here... worst child in the world.)

I did, however, run my first real race and my first 10K on Thanksgiving morning at the Detroit Turkey Trot! What a great time, anyone who can should do it. I got a late start out of the house so I missed out on meeting up with people from work beforehand but I totally surprised myself by how well I did running, considering that I didn't train whatsoever and hadn't run in probs over a month? (Geesh I am terrible) I ran the whole thing without stopping. The views were pretty great all over downtown Detroit, although it was getting rough towards Rosa Parks Blvd because there's less to look at and it was getting a little exhausting. I also for some reason thought a 10K was like, four miles. Not over six. So I was confused at how it wasn't ending after that mile marker, haha. But I did it! I had to use a port-o-potty and blew my nose a lot into my sleeves because it was cold and breezy but I did it!

And the one picture I took whilst with my parents was... the giant hamburger suspended from the ceiling at Mallie's, a Man vs. Food filming location that turns out to be only about 10 minutes from our house. Instead of a huge burger, I got... a salad!!

Since then, the holiday season has started to get pretty busy. Lots of parties and events going on. And I am going to have to talk Darin into returning to Greenfield Village in Dearborn to commemorate the one year anniversary of getting engaged there. It'll be a lot less of him being weird and me ruining his plans than last time, so it sounds like a pretty good idea to me.

Although there aren't tons of good stories to tell, I can barrage everyone with completely whatever pictures that represent our life as Michiganders in pre-winter times...

The tiny little bit of snow that has showed up so far, about a week ago. Actually, even though winter up here terrifies me as a little Sunshine State baby, I am pretty jazzed for snow to start really falling soon!

My first visit to the Renaissance Center and GM Headquarters was on Friday night with some friends from Detroit Cru after a night of learning all about what it would be like to intern as full-time college missionaries (aka the dreamiest job ever). Carzzzzz

This was one of those views where you think, "I HAVE TO PHOTOGRAPH THIS AMAZING MOMENT LOOK WHAT I CAN SEE RIGHT NOW" and then your phone turns it into a murky mess. Anyways, it just encourages you to go to the top of the Ren Cen yourself to see a sweet view of Detroit/Canada.

Well, as it is Sunday, I need to continue down my list of chores that will make the rest of the week more bearable. Glad to catch myself up! Maybe I will please start doing a better job of chronicling important things in life.

Bonus pitchas!

Darin, showing off his masterpiece portrait of my eyeroll face. The media: Ritz cracker and canned spray cheese. >:|

My favorite cube of our IKEA bookshelf thingie that my awesome mother-in-law didn't want anymore. The Tigers & Judy Genshaft are a good pair.

Love, Lara

Decisions, Decisions

I have not written in a long time! It's for the best, I needed to wait a while to have some things that are actually interesting to share with anybody. We (Darin & I) have been living rather busy lives as of late with work and school, so I guess the "adult" life has started. COLLEGE STUDENTS: when people say you have tons of free time at school, believe them!!! I felt so "busy" until I had a house to maintain, a job to go to, and food to make that is somewhat healthy, let alone exercise or read. I did not heed these words. Alas, not important.

Actually, I feel tempted to be anxious right now for several reasons. I just turned down a second interview with Quicken Loans in downtown Detroit. This seems slightly like madness, because who would not pursue more of a full-time job in this economy, especially me? I really hated to do it. I was just faced with a hard choice: do I continue to pursue, and take, a job that requires 60 hours a week on the phone and over ten state licensing exams? If I were single or really interested in becoming a banker for life, this would totally make sense. But I foresee a future rather where I would be kept from attending any dinner bible studies, unable to spend time with family and friends if they came to visit me, and losing out on my most quality time with Darin. The stress would exceed the relief of making a good bit of money. After a great deal of praying about how to proceed with my full-time job search, I decided to hand it over to God and keep looking elsewhere.

Anyone in my shoes looking for work knows what I mean. It is really scary to let God take control of worry about whether you'll ever find a normal full-time job, let alone one that actually stirs any interests or passions in you. (I'm leaving that part on the back burner of my thoughts for the most part right now, haha.) He is able to bring something that allows me a teensy bit more freedom and time to enjoy life rather than dread it; rest assured, if you love phone calls, then you may think I'm a nut, but I think those days would pass so slowly! I am in His hands. If I have to resort to eating only oatmeal for the rest of my meals to make ends meet, then that's what I'll do. I won't make Darin do it. Just me.

So, if anyone would please join with me in praying for this job hunt, that would be so wonderful. I believe that God can give better gifts! Pray that I not only stumble upon something God has for me, but that I will continue to be wise, facing challenges at jobs but also seeking the qualities He wants.

Besides that business, we have been wedding hopping like crazy -- it's that time of year, and we contributed to it as well! -- and it has been a blast.

Macedonian wedding line dancing -- congrats Sam & Vanessa! We partied so hard that we overslept any normal church services... :|

My babester and I looking fancy :)

Later we got ice cream, zazzled up at Dairy Queen. It pays to have friends who work there.

Heck, other unorganized photos that represent what has happened lately, because I got to work at 7:30 this morning and am not in a normal state of mind:

I have to say, I concocted the hottest interview outfit of all time for Quicken last Friday. Maybe it's the first thing I prepared for... maybe. I wore a chambray long sleeve shirt with a brown-ish pencil skirt, a white fake J. Crew bubble necklace, and nude pumps. And curled my hair, which took as long as I remember that it always does, and consequently will continue to do only for special occasions.

Oh yeah, and I finally got (most of) my name changes done! This is a souvenir I took from the Social Security Office, because I was not allowed to take pictures of the even better George Takei Star Trek posters they had everywhere. This is the best ad campaign the government has ever thought of. Keep doing what you do, Social Security, except maybe let me tell you in advance how much faster my thing will be over with than the other people and let me leave sooner. Oh, and Secretary of State was a pain in the biscuit as well, as there was some error and I had to go BACK to Social Security to have them prove AGAIN that I did come in already. (Secretary of State is the DMV up here, to my Florida peeps. Weird, right?) Anyways, the Clinton cards are on their way. Hallelujah! :)

AND... drumroll... it's my birthday!!! Yay! I feel weird saying how old on the internet just because someone could figure out my exact birthday and steal my identity, so suffice it to say that it's not old yet. This is Darin's genius birthday card to me. He knows me so well. Nothing could warm my heart quite like a holographic pug that licks my face as I sway the card in the light. He says this is the closest I will get to owning one as a pet. We'll see. Anyways, we are having sushi after he is finished with class at our favorite restaurant in Dearborn, and then I get my presents! This guy put in hours worth of effort so I know they will be spectacular!

Anyways, that's all there is to say for now! Thanks for your prayers for us and for the birthday well wishes! We are still living the good life up in the Mitten!

Love, Lara

P.S. FALL IS COMING SOON. It's already in the 50's at night. Florida Lara is happy, but dreads the coming extra coldness... :| Stay tuned for my winter clothing picks.

Fun in the D

This morning I couldn't stop myself from going through all my travel photos. (I am employed and start work next week so this bit of Thursday laziness is okay by me! Just to justify my bum actions to myself... sigh.) I think the little map on Facebook caught my attention and had little pins on the places I've been, and it made me nostalgic about all the really cool things I have been able to do already in my lifetime.

I really am the most blessed, lucky girl in the world, in my opinion. I can't believe that at age 22 I've set foot in so many countries. I got to see Paris from the top of the Eiffel Tower, hear Big Ben chime, cross Latinski Most (the bridge where Franz Ferdinaned was assassinated in Sarajevo), jump between boats in the Adriatic Sea in Croatia, and so much more. Even seeing the awesome things within the U.S. is so exciting! I rode the carousel in Central Park and wandered around Alcatraz, and put my hands in Marilyn Monroe's prints on Hollywood Boulevard. I really treasure experiences like those. If it came down to it, I'd sell most of my clothes and things if it meant I got more memories and tried so many new things.

I know it will be a while before Darin and I are able to "travel" again. We would love to go to the Balkans and visit my friends and be total tourists someday. I personally would love to go to Thailand and China and Tanzania but we will not get too far ahead of ourselves, ahaha. Luckily, I am getting more than my fill of new adventures while we are somewhat homebound for the time being!

Darin found out about a Mustache Day at the DIA in honor of a new Dali exhibit, so we went with some friends to enjoy some art... and then brewskis at the Motor City Brewery. I had me some Ghettoblaster for the first time, yum!

I promise someday, I will use a real camera and not be so Instagram-tastic. It's just so easy.

And then, for the next fun thing...

D totally surprised me yesterday by coming home with tickets to the Tigers vs. Yankees game! I was so excited -- I said that I was thinking I wanted to go for my birthday present this year. (I needed an occasion for my Verlander shirt!) Since the Tigers would mostly be away in September, Darin picked out some awesome seats and we had such a good time! I am learning things about sports. ;) We lost but it was a great game anyways. Plus I am a cheapskate gross girl and kept my cup as a souvenir. Whatever! I will start a Detroit weird souvenirs hoarding club.

Every day, I become more and more convinced that God knew what he was doing setting the two of us up and making it so that I would need to move up here for the beginning of our marriage. I really do love this place. Detroit has character that other cities don't have. There is history, former opulence, an all-American feeling, urban flavor, grittiness, and pride. Growing up in Florida, things are mostly too new for that. Our old things are Spanish forts and the winter homes of the famous people from up here. (Seriously -- Henry Ford's winter home was in Ft. Myers I think, haha.) It has a special place in my heart, but now, Detroit does too. I may live about 3 minutes outside the west city limit so it's pretty close. :)

Hopefully, one day, we will be adventuring overseas again, whether just for fun or specifically to share the gospel, but until then, I am thankful to have "smaller" adventures here in Michigan to tide me over!

Oh, and because I sort of mentioned it hit-and-run... I am indeed employed now! I am starting next week at a daycare! It is such a relief. I am starting part time so I am still looking around for other ways to fill that time and make some more bacon but it is better than alternating between going on a cleaning frenzy in our house and then lying around like a couch potato. Anyways, more stuff to come!

Love, Lara

Real Life Begins

I am seriously in a high place of thankfulness right now. My life up here in Michigan so far as been incredibly blessed and promising; the Lord is continuing to meet needs (and just plain wants) that we have had.

First of all, I am in a great position for getting a job very soon! I'll speak more on this later, but have applied to a few places involving child care and have been given paperwork to turn back in and hopefully be employed. Today I braved the needle again -- TB test, the least awful but still a needle -- and once the results come back I can hand all that in! I AM SO RELIEVED. It's interesting how the best opportunities that have come up do involve young kids. That is not what I went to school for and hasn't been my job application focus this whole time but the doors opening are in this direction, so I am excited to move this way and see what is coming my way, because I know it's for a reason.

Also, Darin and I have already had a great deal of community and friend time sent our way upon returning home. We've hung out with several friends and lots of family, and have gracious dinner invitations headed our way to spend more time with people up here. This is something I have been praying for long before coming to Michigan. The hardest thing to leave behind in Florida has not, shockingly, been the weather or Cuban sandwiches, but definitely friends and family for company. Not only is it awesome having Darin around approximately 91839182 times more often than when we were dating, but also connecting with his friends and hopefully making them my friends too! YOU HAVE TO. YOU LOVE ME. :)

I am really loving life up here so far! The weather has been beautiful -- I can't believe how cool it gets at night, haha. There are some super cute bunnies in our yard that I'm sure gardeners hate but I love watching them hop around. Our house is so cozy and is coming together one bit at a time. I am getting used to where things are and finding new spots for hanging out. Darin and I really liked dollar beers at Chesley's down the street and walking to the park near our house after dinner. I am also an mPerks gangsta at Meijer and you KNOW we're living large with fancy groceries and whatnot. Woohoo!

The best part is knowing that we have plenty, but we sure don't need it. If it were taken away somehow, we would still have a God-fearing family in this house (or another house). We know we don't need it all and that our circumstances don't have to be this good to believe in God's faithfulness to us. Being content is all the more reason to rely on Him.

"I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:12-13 (I love when this verse is in its context!)

Can't wait to bring more of the Clintons' adventures as I start working and we head out on the town more often for different things!

Darin hung up all our instruments on the wall in our office and it looks so good!

Yesterday's sushi and Batman date since Darin got a day off :)

My ADVENTURIN' KICKS!!! I finally did the Chaco, Southern delight but bane of my poor husband's existence. Darin, I promise it'll be worth it when we do our outdoorsy business and my feets are happy!

Love, Lara

The Biggest Life Update Ever So Far

Where can I even begin to catch up on what's been going on since I last wrote??

First of all, THIS LITTLE LADY IS MARRIED!

(The gorgeous, gorgeous photography is all thanks to Lauren Schumacher Photography. She is so talented and so much fun!)

Hoooooooolyyyyyyyyy guacamole. I just can't believe it finally happened. The final countdown happened so stinking fast that it would be scary unless you are as sure as I was/am that you were doing the exact right thing. As soon as Darin arrived we were getting our marriage license, packing more things, bachelorette partying, setting up the church, and rehearsal dinner-ing our last single days away. It was so busy but so much fun. Not to mention I have the most helpful friends and family who were all over the place helping get things on the right track and making sure I did not go fruit loops. Which I did not! Success!

First of all, I seriously had the best bachelorette party ever. It was so laid back and fun without being gross in the slightest (NO, I did NOT see Magic Mike, for the last time!). We went to this awesome place in Baldwin Park where you make your own chocolates and had the best time. You can cover all kinds of crazy things with chocolate on a conveyor belt or fill truffles with fun flavors -- I kind of wish I could work there now.

We got to wear some neato paper hats! I look like a 4 year old.

We then headed back to my friend and maid of honor Heather's house for baked potatoes for a great dinner, and then drove out to Universal CityWalk for the night, ending up at a dueling piano bar, which was so fun! They did a great job, and even sang a little "going to the chapel" song for me! :) Lots of crazy drunk college guys there for a 21st birthday congratulated me, haha. We hit up a Latin dancing club there afterwards for a brief bit, before deciding we lacked the skills needed and were tired.

Everything about the wedding experience went so great. The rehearsal dinner at my parents' house was so laid back and fun, and everyone loved the homemade pizza (and Dickeson family recipe drank of course). Slumber partying with my friends before the wedding was so good, especially since those chicas are a little far away now. :( And before I knew it I was downing a yogurt and speeding to my hair appointment. Note to everyone smart: don't forget a button-down shirt. This n00b had to cut off her t-shirt to avoid ruining the hair. Luckily USF lost the game it was from so it isn't a huge tragedy.

As I anticipated from everyone else's wise words, the wedding was a huge blur. Everything happened so fast that it felt fake. Thus, nothing really felt too serious or intense and I never felt the urge to tear up once, even though my sweet groom got a little misty-eyed! I felt bad because I on the other hand had a huge case of nervous giggles and had to hold them in as I walked down the aisle, stood up there and said all my vows -- and then did actually laugh when my dad's phone rang twice while officiating the ceremony and when our cute baby niece/flower girl Drew was babbling away during the wedding -- and before I could blink I was walking back down as a wifey arm-in-arm with my boo! So crazy. We had to hustle to the park for pictures, and then hustle back so everyone could eat Tijuana Flats, and then hustle down to dance and cut the cake, and then after dancing a bit, hustle as my mom pushed us out the door to be sent off through the cloud of bubbles into the getaway car (GO GRANNY CAMRY!) and off!... to finish packing at my house before hitting up the Hilton at Universal.

It was so much fun, and so laid-back. It was the kind of wedding meant for a Lara. Nothing was too serious, little mistakes were funny and not devastating, and I think everyone had fun. I felt like it was a success when my photographer messaged me to say that this was her favorite wedding so far to shoot because everyone was so nice and had a spirit of fun and excitement all day. Yay!

(Again, go Lauren Schumacher Photography!)

I have to insert my little two cents about the wedding budget. Everything turned out gorgeous and fun and for a lot less than some people will spend. Here were our vendors and stores, which all turned out amazingly!

• Dress -- JCPenney (yes, it's really a wedding dress, I promise!)
• Venue -- North Park Baptist Church
• Catering -- Tijuana Flats
• Photography -- Lauren Schumacher Photography
• Florist -- Sheridan Flower Shop
• Cake -- Sam's Club (haha it was a 15 coconut cake) and a good friend Becca made some delicious cupcakes
• DJ -- mwahaha my iPod and my brother
• Officiant -- my pops and Darin's dad
• Bridesmaids dresses -- Forever21, Nordstrom, Express
• Groomsmen outfits -- JCPenney, Etsy for the ties

It was a super fun day but I am glad it's over and that we're getting into married life now!

Our honeymoon was also a blast, booked with the gracious help of our friend (and Darin's sister's mother-in-law) Deb, who has some skills with travel agent business. We went to Captiva Island, Florida at the South Seas Plantation Resort for a week and it was just lovely and so fun. Darin and I went on a dolphin cruise and saw tons of cute dolphins jumping around in the wake, ate at some fancy and exorbitantly expensive restaurants, rode a jetski (which was so scary for me... Darin drives fast), kayaked in the Gulf, tanned a lot and beach walked/swam/etc. 

Just the Instagram version of some of our adventures! :) We had a great time but we're happy to be home, especially after this beast of a trip...

But 18 straight hours later (and LOTS of being bored driving through Ohio at 2 a.m. haha), we are home sweet home in Michigan and are happy as ever. It's definitely a task getting our house to be cozy and set up the way that works best for us, and also me unlearning my Florida driving ways to become a true Michigander with the doodly Michigan lefts. But it's worth it for the nights spent so far game night-having and hookah-smoking and ice cream-getting with friends and going to giant family gatherings. And spending some gift cardage at Target and Bed, Bath, & Beyond. 

Life with the D has been the best adventure so far.

More later as stuff goes on! Love, Lara

A Fortnight

Two weeks from now, I will be a MARRIED WOMAN. HOLY CRAP. THAT IS REALLY HAPPENING.

It's finally beginning to sink in now that the major issues are being ironed out, and my time is now spent mostly on trips to Hobby Lobby for decorations and going through checklist after checklist for important wedding things, just so I don't forget something monumental.

Today was the third and final bridal shower! It was an absolutely awesome time, spent with my best friends from church growing up in Orlando and their moms, who often were moms to me as well from giving me rides to school to housing me during summer school while my parents went on vacation. It was at the house of some of my favorite three ladies, Ms. Gina, Caitlin, and Elena, who I've known for a ridiculously long time and who are so hospitable and fun. We had some delicious chicken salad sandwiches and Texas sheet cake (yessss ma'am the South will rise again!), and made toilet paper dresses and reminisced about funny stories from times past.

Hotties!! Basically I had the best time catching up with some people that have meant a lot to me for a huge chunk of my life. I wish I could have about forty more showers if it means I can keep seeing everyone over and over.

Completely aside and off topic, I am in love with that dress I got from Forever 21 and the $4 necklace I wore today. Dang. Stylish.

I also feel really great about an awesome Pinterest-inspired idea for our guestbook! This website has some great suggestions for unique guestbooks, and I really liked the idea of using a photo book of our brand spankin' new engagement photos as ours! I didn't feel like spending the $40 for a regular book that I likely won't read often at all, so it made sense to make a book using Picaboo with our engagement photos -- which we were going to make anyways -- but leave space for signatures and messages from our wedding guests! I went with Picaboo because Livingsocial had a deal where I paid $20 for a $60 book! Cha-chiiiiiiing! It should be gorgeous!

Especially because our engagement photos look awesome.

My fabulous and talented friend Kristin did an amazing job and was so much fun to be with as she snapped some very genuine pictures of Darin and me. We really do look like that when we're laughing. We hiked all the heck over Detroit and you will see how fantastic those photos are if you leave us a sweet note at our wedding! :) Shameless plug: she is a great photographer and a great friend!

Well, back to shoulder exercise and mixing our wedding music. Won't be too long now!

Love, Lara

Moving to Michigan

So you can probably guess where I am right now! Well, at least partially. I am indeed back in Michigan... in my HOUSE!!!!!!!! GAGAGAGAGA!!!! :)

I mean, our house, but how weird that I can refer to something as my house. I usually called my apartment or dorm of the time my "house" in conversation and people would call me out on that weird habit, but a home is a house and a house is a home to me. But now there is no judgment, people! It is a legit house and it is fly!

Darin and I are in love with this house to the point that it's just silly. I mean, for the price we are paying to rent it, it's amazing. Three bedrooms. Hardwood floors. Huge basement. Pool. Basketball hoop. Yard. Big happy kitchen. Bunnies. (AHH I LOVE BUNNIES! No one else does but me. Typical Florida move.) It is just so nice. And our parents have been ridiculously generous giving us furniture and housewares and helping us set it all up. I am telling you -- this place is swank. I am not usually one to brag, but we are decorating it up nice. I can't wait to have people over for parties when I really live here for good!

We're having so much fun setting up the house and also doing wedding things. Darin's mom and sisters threw a bridal shower that will go down in history as one of the craziest but still fun events of my life. They planned this fabulous afternoon at Mosaic, a really great restaurant in Greektown that Darin's brother-in-law manages, only for the power to go out. For the first time in restaurant memory for them. Who could have planned for that?! Everyone kept remarking on how we were getting a true Detroit experience with things just getting ruined by construction and such, haha. It still worked out totally fine, though. We had a great dinner across the street at Pegasus, where I had my first saganaki and some really ridiculously tasty Greek food, and then cocktails and dessert at Mosaic in the dark. The absence of power worked out fine for me, since it was the perfect temperature for me to be comfy while everyone else thought they were sweating to death -- another typical Florida move. Anyway, it was great re-meeting and spending time with some of Darin's extended family and close friends, as well as some of mine. Even though Darin's aunt forgot the cake that she volunteered to bring -- the never ending joke of the evening that was just too funny -- it was such a fun time that no one will forget, especially me! I had a blast!

And we now have insane numbers of Target gift cards that Darin and I are so pumped to use! :) How do people know us so well??

It's just so crazy how everything is finally coming together. Moments that you've waited for for seemingly forever are happening in a row like BOOM! I have a comfy house at which to arrive when the honeymoon is over, which will be in like... a month. It's so hard to believe. I know there's a lot in this new chapter of life that I am not ready for, whether I realize it yet or not, but God brought this part of my story to pass and has more in store than I can see yet! He knows where my job will be, and how I will fare during my first northern winter (praying for grace now, haha). We will be good stewards of what we have today!

Well, it's time to get ready to go out when Darin comes home from work! My parents have yet to get a tour of the D, so that and dinner at a bar restaurant that Darin got me hooked on at Christmas. Yay! It's a great day in the 313!

Love, Lara

P.S. DISCOVERY: Meijer may just fit the bill for replacing Publix in my life. Now, nothing truly can, because I love their delicious ice cream selections and delightful cooking school samples, and my BOGO sprees. But Meijer has EVERYTHING! And their deals aren't bad -- I got some legit name brand spices on a 10 for $10 deal, and other stuff is randomly half off sometimes. And it's huge, and I got a very cozy Detroit Tigers shirt that I will sleep in and wear out of bed many times. One reassuring part of this move to the mitten is that I can shop with the same joy I had at Club Pub. Sweet. :)

Hurdles

Okay, I have a really interesting update that feels like a huge deal to Darin and I more than other people, probably. I feel like the discussions we've been having and the issues we've been trying to address have really taken over a lot of our conversations since I've been visiting this past week, and yet I wouldn't be surprised if spectators answered back, "What's the big deal?"

The big question has been this: to live in the actual city of Detroit, or not.

It seemed kind of like a given at first. Darin has lived in the city for some years and enjoys the atmosphere, and is very involved in an awesome church on the east side that is very missionally focused towards their community. It requires a strong heart of compassion for a city that not many people feel compassionate about. Detroit does get a worse rap than it deserves, with many people fearing driving downtown to eat somewhere, even. (I've heard similar things about downtown Orlando and the area of Tampa where I live right now. Wimps! Hahaha.)

I have been viewing my transition to moving up here as a lose-all for winning one guy. Not that I was bitter about this, but that the fact of the matter was that I was giving up my familiarity, my weather, my family, my friends, my Publix and Chick-Fil-A (gentle sobbing), and some other things that would be a challenge to say good-bye to. Of course, not permanently, as I am sure I will be visiting my favorite subtropical peninsula sometimes and that some Floridians I love would perhaps pay me a visit in the Mitten, too. Yet I was faced with a huge sacrifice to make the wisest decision -- marrying my best man friend who has a stable job and a super family -- and tried my best to accept it and be at peace.

There was an itching feeling of uncertainty, though, about the caveat of living in Detroit. Now, let me make this quite clear: I have heard gunshots in my lifetime. Some kind of rivalry blew up in the parking lot of where I now live about a year ago and someone ended up with a big bullethole in his butt. (This kind of cracks me up, still, hahaha.) I grew up around and interact with all kinds of different people, not just typical suburban white people. I don't think I'm that sheltered! I guess I just felt like every last bit of comfort I could possibly have was going to be stripped away if I was living in Detroit. I didn't know where to get groceries or gas by myself without being afraid, or parking on the street and hauling patooty back to my house or apartment like I already do now in Tampa.

Darin knew about my discomfort. I wasn't very good at expressing it, either at all or in the right way, but he knew that I was a little less than thrilled at the prospect of setting up camp somewhere that was really unfamiliar to me. He correctly assessed, too, that being a girl, it's just different for me to imagine settling down in the so-called "ghetto" than a guy. He had a bit of a hard time trying to understand how I wouldn't feel safe somewhere if he was going to be there doing his best to protect me.

We had a bit of difficulty trying to figure out the right reasons to live where we would end up living. There are logical and personal reasons from both our points of view that made it hard to be sure. The biggest hurdle was Darin's involvement with his church, because he loves the solid biblical teaching and the community setup, with lots of opportunities to serve and be involved. While I really do like his church and always enjoyed visiting, I just did not have that same personal connection that made me completely devoted to the cause of Detroit and living there to be a good neighbor.

This whole week, we have been at dinner several times talking through our pieces, trying to understand each other while gently pointing out flaws in each other's thought processes. We really had a textbook-worthy series of peaceful, thoughtful, respectful, and loving chats about what to do and why. We both had stubborn little things that we stuck to and couldn't really see past, in some respects. But on Sunday, after Darin discussed these things through with his fellow childcare volunteers, he told me, "Lara, I am deciding that we will wait to live in Detroit."

I was a little relieved, but also nervous that Darin was just giving up things that he cared about and doing something that would make me happy but leave him a little resentful and discontent. I said so. He was still working through convincing his emotional self that he thought it was the right thing to do, but had made the logical decision to stay closer to where he works. He didn't ultimately think we needed to dive into Detroit right away, and that we would in a way be milking all the benefits from his church without fully participating and sacrificing for it, as many other families do by planning to settle down in the city for years, not months.

We are in agreement, and trying our best to comfort each other through our fears and frustrations. Darin keeps saying, "I have never had to make such a hard decision in my life! I'm used to making decisions for just myself." I can totally agree with that, and know that there will be other things we will have to work through to be at peace. And I do want to respect him as a leader, not trying to have two presidents running our family -- I willingly say that Darin is the man of the house and that I trust him to be wise. I know he cares very much about my feelings and opinions, and takes them into account. I want to be able to live this out for our kids one day so that they can rest assured that there are no power battles in our house; Mom and Dad respect one another and make decisions that stick.

In short, I'm thankful for this opportunity to work through something really hard with Darin, and see what it's really like having to live with someone else in marriage, eventually. We both feel stronger for it. So the name of this blog can still be "Living with the D," because we sure will be hanging around in Detroit. I really do love and enjoy it. It's just not where we'll be resting our heads at night for now. And of course, the person "D" is not going anywhere, either. ;)

I hope this encourages people in some way! Especially people who aren't sure that twenty-somethings can make a relationship really work, because they can and they will. Even when it's a little sticky.

Love, Lara