Just as with everything in this world, there are hills and valleys. I've definitely been feeling that the past couple of days. I had a great time in Michigan getting our house all set up and spending time with my in-laws-to-be and my boo, and am just so tired of having to fly back home again after all that.
The light at the end of the tunnel is definitely near. If I really stop and think about it, it kind of freaks me out. Less than a month until I get married! I am so ready for this to happen already. We've been planning for months and dealing with long distance for many months more. It's taking its toll on me, and even though I never have to go away to visit Darin and then leave again, it gets harder every time to go back to "normal life" talking on the phone a few times a day and that being all that you have.
I think the hardest part is the somewhat helpful but painful tidbits of marriage advice I keep getting; "There will definitely be hard times." "Getting married doesn't mean you won't ever feel lonely again." "Adjusting to being married can be really frustrating." On top of the pain of being apart, it just brings a little discouragement to dwell on these thoughts, which are 100% true but just not well timed for me. My excitement about getting married is dampened a little when I think that some of the sad things I deal with in a long distance engagement won't forever disappear when Darin and I start living in the same house.
It's always good to be realistic, and know that nothing is perfect. When you get married, you are entering a covenant that isn't always easy to keep and is shared by a sinner, someone who makes mistakes and won't always gel with your ideas and feelings every second of every day. But sometimes, when you have had it with being a thousand miles away, you just need to focus on the joy of your wedding day. Then, you will at least be together -- not just in the same zip code but the same home! You will probably rub each other the wrong way sometimes, or even get into it a little deeper than that, but you'll have so many more of those special and fun moments that you remember fondly when you sit on another flight home from visiting your love. You're starting a new life with your favorite person and best friend, and can count on being with him when new hills and valleys approach.
That promise, founded on how God designed marriage and desires it to be, is what I'm clinging to in this awkward transition time of frantically finishing wedding preparations and growing weary of having to say goodnight and hang up until tomorrow. Marriage is a gift and a joy, and that is what merits mentioning the most!
Love, Lara
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